Consequences of Catching a Criminal
by marigoldsandmerchants
Summary: In order to catch several criminals that share a victim profile - who have all escaped Santa Barbara Police (but are still in their custody) - Detective Lassiter and the insufferable "Psychic Consultant" Shawn must go undercover as a couple and track them down. There will be Shassie in later chapters. Rated T for language mostly. CHANGING WEBSITES
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer/Author's Note: Steve Franks owns Psych, not me. Also, this fic will contain slash (that's same sex relationships) and violent themes. If you don't like, don't read, don't review. Everyone else, please do so and enjoy.

"You have got, to be kidding with me."

Detective Carlton Lassiter slightly raises his voice to his superior, Chief Karen Vick. 'Psychic' Consultant Shawn Spencer stands beside the man, watching as Lassiter's fists clench tighter, causing his knuckles to spread even whiter. Gus had been called away to a mandatory office retreat, this time somewhere in the opposite coast. McNab is out of work, with his wife and newborn daughter. Juliet is undercover, on a top-priority mission leaving Shawn under Lassiter's responsibility.

Now, the chief has just presented the two men with a lengthy undertaking. Six convicts a kidnapper, a con artist, a rapist, an arsonist, a burglar and a serial killer had escaped the Santa Barbara custody on the way to a trial in which they were undoubtedly guilty. Each has been spotted in a different city and the task is for two members of the Santa Barbara police to track them down (one-by-one) and send them into holding.

Shawn had been excited about the idea in a heartbeat. Carlton had cracked a smile, thinking about the excitement he could have over the next few weeks. However, there are two snags with the plan. One of them, the most obvious, is Carlton and Shawn will have to work together on the open road. The department is even giving them a budget.

The total budget cost is $1,800 over the course of what should take approximately twenty days. They are given a $1,000 budget for room costs, a $500 budget for food costs, and a $300 budget for gas costs since they will be taking Lassiter's car. A condition on Lassiter's side will be that he is out of a work suit. He is allowed to keep his actual identification, badge and cuffs in a side satchel; his gun and a license to carry said gun is allowed on his person. The second snag, which has surprised them both, is, they will be undercover as a couple.

"Detective Lassiter, I am not forcing the two of you to sleep together or instigate any ulterior motive. I am informing you that you will be undercover as boyfriends."

"You want this, thing to be my boyfriend?"

"Oh, sweetheart, don't you love me anymore?" Shawn gasps in a dramatic tone.

The chief bites her tongue to keep any comments to herself. Lassiter glares at the younger man and cracks his knuckles. Shawn flinches a little but doesn't move. Both can tell there is a hesitant look on the chief's face, as if there is something big she is holding back. Shawn's smile drops and Lassiter raises an eyebrow. She finally sighs.

"Well, you will need to sleep in the same bed. Though, I'm not saying 'sleep together', you understand. And, the kissing."

"I'm not kissing him." Lassiter answers steadfastly.

"Well, what are you going to say?" Shawn asks defiantly.

"That you're sick, you just puked, you're wasted, I'm sick, I'm going to puke, we can't stop when we get going," He rattles off a list of explanations.

"So we can't quit, huh?" Shawn raises an eyebrow.

"Uh-huh." The chief purses her lips. "And the hand-holding?"

"That's a big factor in this, isn't it?" Lassiter groans, massaging his temple.

"I'm afraid so, Detective. The one thing that links all these criminals together is their targets appear to be openly gay partners. If you two won't kiss, there will need to be handholding."

Lassiter breathes out a strong line and Shawn is standing nervously beside him. After a few moments of awkward silence, Lassiter drops the arm that had been massaging the pain. It hits Shawn's dangling arm, catching Spencer by surprise. He jumps a little upon contact, as if worried he would be hit. Instead, Lassiter's fingers intertwine with Shawn's and bring the connected hands up to show Chief Vick.

"Alright, I'm impressed. Here are your new identities." She hands one to each of them. "Please don't kill each other." 


	2. Chapter 2

[] Wow, I never thought I would receive so many reviews for my first published chapter. Really, I wasn't even sure I would get one. PsychLassieFan4Ever, you are my first ever reviewer and I thank you for being interested. I love "Distract Me." IlluminatiGirl, this isn't wholly Shassie, but I hope you will like it when it comes to that. lolgal555, I am so happy to be the cause of fangirling. PotterKitten, I have continued. This chapter has Carlton and Shawn heading for Manteca, fighting over things like food stops, music and where they'll sleep. Remember I don't own the familiar people and enjoy. []

"Only one available?" Shawn asks over the phone. "Yes, we'll take it. No, thank you."

Lassie tries hard not to ask Shawn anything. They are under new identities, as a couple no less. He simply clenches the steering wheel as Shawn continues to stare at him. His focus is on the road. Shawn, though, keeps squirming in the passenger seat, whining slightly. After some lengthy time, Lassie cannot take it, through grit teeth, he curses.

"Where the hell are we staying, Spencer?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" He exclaims brightly. "But you know once we get to Manteca, I'm"

"Perrin Landon, I know. And I'm Timothy Sprout. Now, where will we be staying?"

"Motel 6."

"Great." He sighs. "We couldn't even get a hotel."

"Now, Lassie." Shawn reprimands. "It's only $64 a night and it got three out of five stars! I think that's pretty nice."

Lassiter grunts but keeps his eyes on the road. Shawn sighs defeated but reaches for the radio. After he halfheartedly sings along to a few songs, he starts switching the channels. This drives Lassie up the wall. He smacks Shawn's hand away and turns off the radio. Shawn yelps a little, yanking his hand away. Lassie slaps harder than Gus when Shawn tries to take his food.

"Trick or treat."

"What!?"

Shawn shrugs. "Read my bluff."

"What bluff? Spencer, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Second Chances."

"What, Shinedown?" Lassie asks. "Spencer, are you singing parts of a remix?"

"Wow, Lassie." Shawn beams. "I didn't know you were so pop cultured."

"I know more than you think, Landon." He rolls his eyes.

Shawn looks up at him with an awed expression. He glances to the clock and reads 4:45 as Lassie pulls into the lot. They grab their bags and Lassie drapes an arm around Shawn's shoulder, tripping Shawn when the younger man tries to snake an arm around his waist. They walk to the front desk like this and Lassie has his wallet out.

"One room, under Timothy Sprout. And Perrin Landon."

"Landon, comma Perrin. Ah, paid through Expedia. Room 504." The man behind the counter eagerly hands Lassie the room key.

The two climb onto an elevator, holding it for a twenty-something woman. Lassie presses the floor number and she presses the one below it. She winks flirtatiously at Lassie, who smiles politely but obviously isn't interested in the least. Shawn decides to save him, more or less.

"Oh, Honey. What do you think of taking a long hot bubble bath when we get into our room?"

The girl shields her eyes immediately growing hot. Lassie had been initially caught off-  
guard, but quickly realized what he had been doing.

"You know I'd rather be taking a shower." He answers with a bit of a sensual tone, shocking Shawn as well as the girl. "Just the two of us, in that tight, confined space."

The woman leaves the elevator at her stop and races down the hall, completely embarrassed. As the doors close, Lassie is wearing a smug, satisfied grin and Shawn is bewildered, with his mouth wide like a fish. Still smirking, Lassie struts out of the elevator on the next floor, and immediately to their room. He is already walking in when Shawn snaps back to reality. He almost runs into Lassie, panting.

"What was that?"

"Acting. You should try it sometime, Psychic." He answers in a sarcastic, mocking tone.

The words are out of Shawn's mouth before he can stop them. "That was hot."

Lassie stares back and tilts his head but says nothing on the matter. "I'm going to unpack and take a shower. Alone. You can order room service."

"Macaroni and wine!"

Lassie rolls his eyes again and heads to the shower, quietly wishing Shawn will keep to the budget and get something that actually tastes good together. Half an hour later, Lassie is in navy blue silk pajamas with his hair brushed back. He heard the door open, presumably to bring in the food, and close a little later. He stretches and walks back to the eating area to find Shawn also with wet hair, wearing a bright blue flannel pajama set with little winking pineapples all across.

"What monstrosity have you ordered us, Spencer?"

Shawn looks up, shocked to find Lassie out of a suit. He realizes a lot of what Lassie, or Timothy, has done today has surprised him. Grinning, he starts to visualize how things might be by the end of the case.

"Get your head out of the clouds." Lassie's aggravated tone brings Shawn back to reality. "And don't start thinking we're going to get an actual relationship out of this case."

Shawn's eyes widen and his cheeks flush a tad. "How'd you"

"Unfortunately," He narrows his eyes. "I know how your mind works."

"Oh, really?" Shawn pipes up, words forming before he can stop them. "Then how'd I know about you and Lucinda?"

Unimpressed, Lassie answers. "When I stuck her shirt tag back in and my hand brushed against her hair, you caught that in the mirror."

"Wait, you were putting her shirt tag in? You two weren't, like, having an affair?" Shawn's face scrunches.

Lassie stares hard at the younger man, secretly enjoying the discomfort displaying on Shawn, or Perrin's, features. Finally, he cracks a smirk and answers with a short sigh.

"Yes, I was just putting her tag in. But, yes, we were having an affair. Great job, Psychic. Right answer. Wrong clues."

Shawn frowns despite being right. Lassie really has him rethinking his process. That had been the first thing he'd told the police to make them believe he was really psychic. Maybe Lassie really knows more than he lets on. He's got to know another from the same day. Closing his eyes, he lowers his gaze to the floor and turns to Lassie.

"What about Buzz and the wedding?"

Lassie groans as if it were obvious. "McNab had been muttering dance steps under his breath all that morning. I think I ordered him to stop about three or four times. I had half a mind to push him down the stairs."

"You DID push me down the stairs that one time."

"You can't prove it." Lassie grins deviously. "Now, what did you order us from room service?"

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Hello. Review if you please. It helps when people like what I am writing, so I can write more. And yes, I realize I haven't contributed to this story in three-and-a-half months, but I am contributing now. It has not been abandoned. ? 


	3. Recon

I'm giving control of this story over to _**scaryfangirl2001**_ on **AO3**


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